Festivus is upon us once again, the time for pulling the ol' aluminum Festivus pole from the crawl space and leaning it up in a corner, unadorned to be admired for its strength and durability. No decorations, of course, tinsel is quite distracting.
I'm really looking forward to the Festivus meal...Leftovers. Tamales this year, which will actually be really good. Tonight's meal will be paired with a snifter of Slivovitz plum brandy. Ouch!
After the meal, we will all kick back and observe the airing of the grievances. We will go around the table one-by-one and tell each person the ways in which they have disappointed us over the past year. And let me tell ya, I got a lot of problems with those people!! And now, they are gonna hear about it. They all STINK!!!
And after the Airing of the Grievances, we will move on to the feats of strength. The head of the household will challenge whoever he wants to a wrestling match and Festivus won't end until the head of the household is pinned.
And, Dear Reader, in the spirit of Festivus, a donation of $100 has been made in your name to the Human Fund. You know, money for people.
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